expat living, life in korea

Making Friends For a Reason

How do you make friends? Do you make friends because you instinctively like the person? Do you make friends because you need them?

What are your reasons for making friends with a particular person?

A month ago, a mother living in the same apartment where I live sent me a message if I had time to spare so that our boys could play together. I readily agreed as Little Dynamo and I were free that time. And I have already said no several times in the past because our schedule wouldn’t permit it. After several meetings and after knowing that my son has a playgroup scheduled every Wednesday, she also asked if we can schedule our boys’ playtime together. Now, aside from school, my son’s weekdays are full:-).

She is a very efficient mom with a very smart and obedient boy. She is one of those rare Korean women who believes that the English language is not a subject. It should be part of their daily life. Her little boy, without an English hagwon, speaks good english for his age. The boy can speak both Korean and English… because the mom makes the effort to speak to him in English. During one of our play time last week, the mom spoke Korean to another lady. Her boy reminded her “Don’t speak Korean. It’s English time”.

It dawned on me. Oh, my son and I are good companies for the boy’s English education:-). Kids don’t lie.

I know Korean moms are aggressive when it comes to their children’s development, even more so for their children’s English education. English is just a must in this very competitive society. I also know that some of my friends initially like to be with me to learn a thing or two about the English language or at least, practice their English speaking skills. It’s just that, this is the first time that it hit me straight in the face.

Nope, I didn’t take it against her. I was simply amused. Truth be told, I also enjoy being with her and learning from her. I think I have learned a lot of insights from her, in terms of how Korean moms are, more than from any other Korean friend that I have.

Oh well, sometimes the motives do not matter anymore when, in the process, you would grow to genuinely like each other’s company:-).

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2 thoughts on “Making Friends For a Reason

  1. It hurts sometimes when people make friends obviously for the benefit. However, thanks to some friends, I’ve learned not to think about that and focus on showing them that you are loyal no matter what. By far, some have noticed my effort to reach out to them as a real friend and some still stay insensitive. I’m just keeping in mind that we can not please everybody. ^^

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